An Enlightening Weekend

This weekend we went to Austin because I was playing in my first adult competitive volleyball tournament. I had noticed in the morning that it sounded like Clara had some boogery stuff in her nose. She sounded like a little piggy snorting. By that night, the poor thing kept tossing and turning while snorting away and having a hard time breathing. I felt so bad for her! The day had finally come, our baby was sick (just a cold, but still!). Just like the first days home from the hospital, you have that "what in the world am I supposed to do?" feeling. As Jason is trying to hold her upright, I'm searching the Internet (I know, such a great place to look up medical advice) looking for the best way to suction out her nose. Jason stayed up with her being the amazing husband he is. The next thing I know it's 5AM and I look over to see she is asleep in her car seat inside the pack n play. Jason (who I call the baby whisperer sometimes) figured she just needed to be upright to sleep. Genius.

Soon after, I was off to the tournament. I would like to brag I pretty much played the worst game of my entire life (including junior high) during the first game. I'm not exaggerating. I don't think I have even seen ANYONE play as bad as I did. I was completely mortified, but more so, felt bad for the people I was playing with. They had come all this way to play with the worst setter in the gym. I apologized about 800 times to my team (who I had just met that day by the way) and slumped off to pump during our off game. So here is the enlightening experience. As I'm sitting there in an abandoned first aid room, drenched in sweet, hooked up to my breastpump..."Whomp Whomp...Whomp Whomp...Whomp Whomp..." I came to a bitter sweet realization. Volleyball just wasn't what it used to be. A sport that I had such a deep love and passion for had become so pale in comparison to my new life as a mommy. Even when I was pregnant, I longed to play competitively again. But as soon as Clara came that desire pretty much disappeared. Sitting in that room, breathing in the strong odor of alcohol and antiseptic soap, tears came to my eyes as I thought about Clara being sick for the first time and me not being there for her (Jason had called and said she had a fever). Yes, I knew she was being taken care of perfectly, but her mommy wasn't there. I know it may not sound like a big deal, but to come to the realization that this sport almost meant nothing to me anymore was a HUGE deal. I was the type of player in college that after practicing for 3 hours I would stay after to work on some skill I felt I hadn't mastered, just because I loved it! I couldn't get enough. I always saw myself as an 88 year old still diving on the court. But when they say things change when you have a child, it's so true! As the day went on, I got better and stopped doubling the ball every other play, and even started to have a little fun. Still, my heart just longed to be with my family. I don't think I'm one of those people who can't be away from their kid for more than two seconds (I've been away plenty of times), but I felt like I was just wasting my time. The day ended and I was happy to go home to my baby and family. Who knows, I still may end up playing when I'm 88, but for now, I find more joy in sucking snot out of my baby's nose... :)

PS. Sorry for the super long post (I try to keep them short) but I just wanted to say I have the best in-laws in the world! They love Clara so much and ALWAYS take care of us more than we could ever ask!

Some recent pictures....


Dakota like laying in the boppy since Clara doesn't really use it anymore

Trying to roll over

Dakota stare down

Yummyyyyyyyyy

On the way to Austin

Me not screwing up. HAHA

Resting at Grandma and Grandpa Campbell's after a rough day

Jason's cousin's (Melissa) new baby Braydon!

Rolling over one way!!!

Halloween

Clara turned 3 months this past week! I can't believe my baby is a quarter of a year old! She also had her first Halloween. She was in her costume for approximately 23.5 minutes before she passed out. I woke her up to take pictures with Madilyn and she wasn't too happy at first, poor thing. Jason and I threw some "costumes" together and attempted to dress like hippies. We weren't really in sync with Clara's "flower fairy" costume, but at least we tried to be festive. haha. Jason had begged me to buy her the hot dog baby costume that Target sells but I refused. :) It was such a pretty night so we just sat in our driveway, carved pumpkins, passed out candy and chatted with neighbors. The puppies even got to be involved, poor attention deprived things.

Also over the weekend I did my first craft fair! Wow, I feel so "crafty" writing that. I shared a booth with a couple other girls. We were selling baby/little girl/mommy stuff. Once we set all of our stuff up we looked around and realized "uhhhh, maybe this isn't the best place to be selling trendy little baby products..." The average age of attenders was not really conducive with what we were selling and the place strongly smelled like moth balls (I think you can figure out what I mean). Don't want to offend anyone of a particular age reading this :) But I ended up doing ok and was pleasantly surprised I sold what I did. Since this was an all weekend thing Jason got to have "daddy clara time" (that's what Jason calls it) allllll weekend long. Jason took Clara over to see the lovely grandmas and they had a good time and OF COURSE loved her UT cheerleader outfit.

I forgot to turn off the low quality setting on my camera so the pictures aren't very good. :(

Pumpkin time

Dakota with bat wings and Princess Amber. She looks thrilled.

Clara and her neighbor friend Madison

Scary astronaut guy
Our little flower fairy Happy, but struggling to stay awake


"Madilyn, why are they making us do this? Seriously, get me out of this thing"

Grandma Mary and Grandma Grace

Some of the stuff I made...

"Mommy Clutch"

Clip Holders...

October

I can't believe it's been so long since I've written! I'll just title this post "October" since it will pretty much sum up the month. Looking back on this month, trying to figure out what to write about, it seems like a blur. Every day goes by so fast! Clara is growing so fast and I can't believe she will be 3 months this coming Friday. She is starting to "talk" more and can reach for things now. When I feed her she likes to reach her hands up and touch my mouth. Monday's are "date night" with Jessica and Madilyn since Brandon is in school that night. It's fun to watch Madilyn grow as well. They are surely becoming best friends. :)

Two weekends ago we went on the high school youth retreat in Livingston. It was an absolutely beautiful weekend. I was a little stressed about bringing Clara but she was perfect! She slept in her pack in play in the cabin with all the girls, got held a lot during the day and hung out in her stroller during services and rec time. She enjoyed watching daddy climb the rock wall. The theme for the weekend was REVEAL. We learned about how important it is not to pretend like you've got it all together and that it's okay to "reveal" your struggles with others in the body of Christ. That we as believers are to love and support and challenge each other in our daily lives. It was really cool to see God working in the students' hearts as they opened up. I know even as a leader I sometimes become naive to the fact that even MY girls struggle with some hard core stuff. Knowing that some of my precious girls deal with depression, suicidal thoughts, body image issues, anger, bitterness, jealousy, etc broke my heart. It was yet another time to remind them of the grace God gives and that He is our ultimate healer. Because so many of them opened up about these issues, Christy and I can now take steps in getting them help. I just love them!

This past weekend we had our first garage sale with our friends Robin and Lee. It was neighborhood wide so there were a lot of people. Again, the weather was perfect and we had so much fun sitting outside and making a little money. We made $164! Woo Hoo! It's funny to see some of the stuff people will buy.

Looking forward to Clara's first Halloween! Ok, here's a ton of pictures...

Staying warm at the garage sale

Preslee is priceless

Robin teaching Preslee about not going into the street. Go momma!
Jason hanging out with Clara and Madilyn

We've got the goods

Daddy Clara time
What's up Madilyn?

Well Hello
I love camp!

Us

Callie about to climb the wall

Jason about to sprint up the wall...
3 seconds later...
Pretending to hang from the edge
Mission accomplished
Time to get down now. Zip line!
Jason and Chaz, 12th grade guy leaders. Oh, and of course best friends as well. :)

Somehow she slept through crazy loud music
Camp Cho-yeh

Some of our girls

On our way home. Camping wore me out.

Little Pumpkin
My friend Marissa's son, Kanin, turned one this month. I can't believe he's already one! He's so cute.
Hanging out with the family. Grandma Mary.
Gramps
I like to sleep, can you tell? (in Grandma Mara's arms right now) My mom and dad very much appreciate it. :)
Little gangster baby See ya